Marcin Bałczewski – Alexander von Kler

1. Alexander

Alexander von Kler, son of Austrian émigrés. Born in Belitor at the start of 1958. In all fairness, a man whose life sort of passed him by. Never good at anything in particular. Not even petty crime. Which is what he was – a small time crook. Always caught in the act, most often thieving, pickpocketing or pilfering from supermarket shelves. Then spending most of his life behind bars. First in a borstal, then a proper jail. This son of Austrian émigrés.

He did try his luck with an Elizabeth Moorey, but it didn’t pan out. Unsurprisingly. Again, the fault of his ill-starred nature. In 1994, while serving time in Penstyle, one of his usual retreats, Alexander was told of the tumour. He was not surprised, having been a habitual smoker since his earliest days, going through up to four packs a day. Which is probably why news of the illness didn’t make any particular sort of impression on him. Some two year later, doing time following the theft of a Volvo automobile, an unexpected visitor brought him a proposition from the Institute of Development for the Good of Humankind. Its representatives had selected him as a potential candidate for their research. Following his impending demise, Alexander’s body would be divided into three parts and then placed in three separate departments of the Institute, located in three distant parts of the globe. Without pausing to ponder for long, von Kler accepted the offer. What other disaster could fate throw his way? And so, a few days after his death, on the 17th of June 1998, Alexander’s body was carved threefold with laser beams and packed off to three separate ends of the earth. The flesh of this son of Austrian émigrés.

2. Alexander’s fragments

Alexander’s organism, or rather one part of it, was placed in the Institute of Hypernatural and Conceived Life in Ashburg, Germany. Floating in formaldehyde, said remains found their way into one of the larger display cabinet in the Institute galleries. One of the other exhibits sharing space with the remains of this son of Austrian émigrés was the carved member once property of King Deeha, chief of a certain tribe originating out of the territories now otherwise known as the Democratic Republic of Congo. It had been added to the collection at the start of the 20th century. The legend which followed it was rather bloody and brutal. The tale of King Deeha and his wooden member went back as far as the 17th century, when this grand chief was busy conquering new tracts of lands and peoples. At the peak of his reign, the Deeha kingdom was comparable in size to present-day India. The member was said to have been carved half way through this military conquest, as it must be added that the wars he waged resulted in immense casualties, which, in spite of the increasing range of his rule, caused the number of his subjects  to dramatically decrease. One of the court shamans ordered a male member to be carved from the oldest tree in Africa, which, it was believed, would restore tha rate of the imperial birth rates. According to legend, the King himself went on to father over a hundred offspring, and they a hundred each again. Thus said chunk of carved timber helped the avert the demise of a royal house which had survived until the start of the 20th century.

Among the other exhibits keeping Alexander’s bodily part company was a giant stone tablet dating back to approximately the 12th century, the pre-historic script etched into its surface charting the twelve steps of the Ancing Way. As it had been discovered within the walls of a city called Djah, they called it the Djah Ance.

Three preparatory steps

1. Ance is not a gesture of the body, certainly not of the soul. It exists beyond-matter and beyond-soul. Therefore only those beings which have neither body nor soul can Ance.
2. There are no movements within Ance, motion is the manifestation of matter, nor is there thought within it, as thought is the manifestation of soul.
3. Anyone attempting it is in an intractible position, Ancing being impossible to learn, seeing as there are no beings beyond body or spirit.

Four Basic Steps

4. Revolution is basic. Both inner as well as outer. Therefore only the constant changing of perspective befits Ancing.
5. Lightness is fluff and fluff is a synonym. Which is why true lightness is only achieved through Ancing.
6. Transparency as such is fundamental. Therefore only mist provides true Ance.
7. Speed is necesary for launching into Ance.

Four Advanced Steps

8. Stability is a given. Nothing can be be changeable and inconsistent, light, transparent or quick. Only Ance.
9. Multiplicity, not duality, trinity or millenia. This is Ance.
10. This step has hot been recorded, as it is too difficult to comprehend.
11. No word or instruction can approach the state of Ancing.

12. To achieve this step is inconcievable. If you have succeeded in doing so, you erred somewhere. Turn back.

For K…


pdf EN translated by Marek Kazmierski

Marcin Bałczewski (born 1981 in Lodz). Author of the post-novel “In search of a lost point” (2002). has had several short stories published in, among others; Lampa i Iskra Boża, Fraza, Kresy, Portret, Pogranicza, Topos, Puzdro, Zabudowa Trawnika, Cegła, Arterie, fo:pa. Collaborates with Puzdro and Zabudowy. Has appeared in “2008 – Anthology of contemporary Polish stories”. This year, Forma Press wil publish his collection of short stories entitled “Malone”. Opcja (web) and Kresy has published selected passages from his  novel-in-progress “Eva Morales de Nacho Lima”.

Marcin Bałczewski (ur. 1981 w Łodzi). Autor postpowieści “W poszukiwaniu straconego miejsca” (2002), kilkudziesięciu opowiadań opublikowanych w prasie (m. in. Lampa i Iskra Boża, Fraza, Kresy, Portret, Pogranicza, Topos, Puzdro, Zabudowa Trawnika, Cegła, Arterie, fo:pa). Współpracownik Puzdro i Zabudowy. Znalazł się w antologii “2008 – Antologia współczesnych polskich opowiadań”. W tym roku Wydawnictwo Forma wyda zbiór opowiadań pt. “Malone”. Na łamach Opcji (net) i w Kresach publikowano fragmenty pisanej powieści “Eva Morales de Nacho Lima”.